"how do you come up with these?", my father-in-law asked me this weekend.
i tried to answer with how i actually made them, materials i used, and
sources of inspiration. but that's not the real answer. and it's been on my
mind since.
i think that's actually what people want to know when they ask about an artist's process. it's not "and what stroke was next?", it's "how did you come
up with this?" that's what i would want to know, anyway.
and i've actually been searching myself for that answer lately, too. "what am i trying to get across?"
the answer, the technique and the product is always changing, but one thing i realized that's vague but true: i'm creating what i FEEL when i look at something.
and thankfully (or not) the world around us, the sea, nature, is always changing. sometimes it doesn't work. sometimes it's perfect, beyond me. sometimes i'm not sure, for a long time.
even though he was just asking a question trying to further understand the mentality... and even though he has reason to be interested ... he was asking with such intention and awe that my heart lit up - he gets it. i am actually speaking a language that other people understand, even if i can't explain it. even the very abstract pieces. sometimes even jay will look at something and not "get" it. the whole process can be so individual and internal, that the validation of someone like my father-in-law "getting it" was awesome.
people come at art from all different angles. they, too, have passions and a lot of them aren't as easily shared. i know it takes a lot to wrap your head around someone else's, even your own. that's why, when someone comes at my messy studio world with excitement and open eyes, i truly appreciate it. lighting up and asking questions and touching things like it's a part of them they've been missing since they were kids.
sometimes, a mark is made because i know that a color will balance something here, or a line will draw your eye there. but usually, the determining factors about "why" and "how" are the feelings i experience when i look at something that possess me to create and express them. i can't help but process them. i need to. i'm not always so open to it, and even when i'm not very inspired, it eventually comes back. which is why i continue to chase it.
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| his favorite |
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| this and below, new littles. |
thanks for listening and looking.
